Anyone Got a Flamethrower?

I’ve had to give up running because of a truly joyful case of plantar fasciitis, so I’ve been walking instead. Came across this yesterday on my walk. And I thought the poison ivy hedge of one of my neighbors was one of the more prominent dangers in my neighborhood. I was listening to music but it was in between tracks, and I heard the nest before I saw it.

hornet's nest on satellite dish

Hornet’s Nest on Satellite Dish

It’s hard to see any good coming from this. Sooner or later, the hapless owner of this dish is probably going to have someone go, Dad, the TV’s not working.

Frankly, I’d call a professional. Or complain to the dish company. Those poor techs. They’ve likely seen worse.

I have to admit a certain admiration for the incredible delicacy of the papery husk of the nest. Seems almost a shame to hose it down with insecticide. Flamethrower?

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About Steve, i.e., him

Stephen Stark is an award-winning novelist and bestselling ghostwriter. His fiction and nonfiction has appeared in numerous publications, including The New Yorker, the Washington Post, and the New York Times, Poets & Writers and in many other journals. He has been a fellow and taught at the Bread Loaf Writers Conference, and won an NEA Literature Fellowship in fiction. His novel, Second Son, was a New York Times Book Review Notable Book of 1992, and a New and Noteworthy Paperback of 1994.

One thought on “Anyone Got a Flamethrower?

  1. We had one of those on our house years ago. A local university professor has a summer hobby of collecting the wasps and selling them to pharmaceutical companies.

    When he came by to look at the nest, he asked if he could wait a few weeks until it got bigger. The wasps didn’t bother us, so we didn’t mind. When it was time to remove it, he came in the early early morning hours and sucked them out with a vacuum (and then froze them? I can’t remember). He gave us the empty nest.

Tell me what you think. Seriously.